You ever feel like the whole damn planet suddenly remembered Africa exists. Not because they actually give a shit about Africans, but because the minerals are running low everywhere else and China has been scooping up the continent like it’s a Black Friday sale?
Because that’s exactly what’s happening. And now, out of nowhere, every global superpower is acting like they’ve always loved us, like they’ve always been reliable partners, like they didn’t spend the last 40 years treating African nations like charity cases they were bored of funding.
And the funniest, saddest, most batshit part?
They’re selling it to us with a straight face.
Look at the U.S. Suddenly talking about “partnership,” “trade cooperation,” “shared values,” “mutual benefit,” blah blah blah.
Meanwhile, the Treasury is gearing up to supercharge programs like AGOA and PGII (trade incentives, infrastructure financing, investment guarantees) all packaged as if the U.S. woke up one morning and said, “Hey, maybe we should be nice to Africa.”
No, motherfucker. You’re not being nice. You’re being strategic.
Because China has been winning.
Winning hard.
Winning in plain sight.
While America was lecturing Africa about governance and human rights with the enthusiasm of a disappointed uncle, China was building roads, bridges, airports, power plants, train stations. Dirty deals? Sometimes, sure. Debt traps? In certain places (actually everywhere), absolutely. But they were there, physically present, pouring concrete and handing out loans like candy while the U.S. was busy setting up military bases and crafting statements condemning elections they didn’t like.
So now Washington is panicking. A whole continent leaning toward Beijing means China controls supply chains for the minerals needed to run the 21st century, cobalt, lithium, copper, rare earths, the whole sacred periodic table of global capitalism. And America can’t have that. Hell no. Because whoever controls Africa’s minerals controls the future of energy, tech, EVs, aerospace, AI hardware, literally everything.
So what do they do?
They “pivot.”
They “re-engage.”
They “reset relations.”
Which is diplomatic code for:
“China is eating our lunch and we’re not about to starve.”
And don’t get it twisted, this isn’t aid at all. Neither is it generosity. This is the U.S. Treasury sharpening its knives for a geopolitical knife fight. Africa is the buffet.
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Now take AFRICOM, America’s beloved African military footprint. Oh, they loved that thing. They treated it like their favorite action figure. Until the Sahel went and flipped them a giant middle finger. Coups in Mali, Burkina Faso, Niger, and suddenly the U.S. finds itself kicked out, humiliated, and watching Russia move into West Africa like it’s opening a franchise.
The Sahel effectively told the West: “Pack your bags. Your influence expired.”
And the U.S. has been scrambling ever since.
That’s why Trump is banging the drum about Nigerian terror issues. Not because he gives a shit about Nigerians being kidnapped and killed, if he cared about Africans dying, we would’ve seen it before. It’s because terrorism gives the U.S. a moral excuse to put boots back on the ground. A Trojan horse shaded in the colors of “security cooperation.”
Terrorism becomes the new “in.”
The new Golden Ticket.
The clean slate to walk back into West Africa without looking like you’re begging.
Because one thing America will never, ever accept is China and Russia dividing Africa between themselves while Washington sits outside the party like a bouncer nobody pays anymore.
But Russia, oh boy Russia is the one playing chess while everyone else thinks it’s checkers. They don’t bother with diplomatic niceties. They don’t send ambassadors to talk about “shared democratic values.” Russia sends Wagner – or, after Wagner’s rebranding, the Africa Corps. They offer security, guns, training, propaganda, and regime protection. And in exchange, they get mining concessions, loyalty, anti-Western sentiment, and the chance to kick France, the EU, and the U.S. out of their former playgrounds.
The Sahel is now basically a giant Russian billboard that reads:
“We’re open for business, dictators welcome.”
While China takes care of construction and America tries to resurrect its reputation with investment deals, Russia handles the dirty work. It’s a perfect little triangle of influence and Africa is the table they’re playing on.
And what does Africa get?
That’s the punchline.
Africa gets the same thing it always gets when powerful countries get horny for influence:
Used. Extracted. Lied to.
The new scramble for Africa isn’t about ideology. It’s not communism versus capitalism. It’s not East versus West. It’s not freedom versus tyranny. It’s a resource race dressed in the flimsy, see-through lingerie of partnership.
And every country involved is pretending otherwise.
America wants minerals and political leverage against China.
China wants markets, infrastructure influence, and long-term economic dominance.
Russia wants military access, extraction rights, and geopolitical disruption.
And Africa? Africa wants development. Jobs. Stability. Value addition. Technology transfer. Respect. A seat at the damn table for once.
But instead, the table is being sold in pieces.
And the chairs are already occupied by men who don’t live here.
You know what pisses me off most? It’s how all these big global actors talk over Africa, and then turn around and tell us how lucky we are to be included. Africans know exactly what’s happening. We see the ships, the soldiers, the delegations, the businessmen, the “special envoys,” the sudden interest in election cycles, the investment forums popping up like mushrooms.
This is colonialism wearing a new outfit.
This is empire in business-casual.
This is the Cold War sequel series.
And yes, the Herald Zimbabwe will call it “re-engagement” and “post-liberal diplomacy” and “friend to all, enemy to none” because The Herald will literally call a pile of typhoid and cholera infested human shit “innovative organic fertilizer” if it means scoring points with whoever is in power.
But the truth?
The truth is uglier, sharper, more profane:
Africa didn’t start the new Cold War, but Africa will pay the price of it.
Because the continent isn’t being courted for its people.
It’s being courted for its resources.
And when you’re valued only for what you have, never for who you are, the end of the story is always the same:
You get conquered.
Or compromised.
Or “partnered with” into poverty.
The U.S. wants to win back influence.
China wants to keep it.
Russia wants to disrupt it.
And Africa wants a future.
The problem is:
The people who want a future aren’t the ones negotiating it.
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